Saint Putin, the Justice Ministry against rap, and Okhlobystin's "Russian chaos": a fresh #ShameReview from "NeMoskva"
Russian officials, Z-patriots, and church leaders continue to compete in the absurdity of their public statements and initiatives. This week, the Ministry of Justice declared war on Russian rap, St. Petersburg authorities decided to turn half the metro into a memorial made of trophy armor, and actor Ivan Okhlobystin, amid widespread drone strikes, suddenly invoked the term "thieving officials." We've compiled the most resonant and absurd statements in our regular review.
The Justice Ministry is against beats: rappers are accused of transforming Russians' consciousness.
The Russian Ministry of Justice has identified a new source of threat to the nation—domestic rap. Deputy Minister Oleg Sviridenko publicly stated that contemporary Russian-language rap music, which promotes drugs, violence, and the rejection of traditional moral values, is causing citizens to "cease to think critically."
According to the official, the situation has been catastrophically worsened by modern digital technologies.
"Previously, we used printing presses and radio stations, now we use streams, music videos, Telegram channels, and the images of popular artists. These are all just new forms for transforming the consciousness of our citizens," Sviridenko explained.
The deputy minister specifically emphasized that in the coming year, Russian law enforcement and regulatory agencies will "focus specifically and closely" on popular hip-hop artists.
Digitalization of elections in the Urals: the electoral commission unveiled the AI bot "Dobrynya."
The Sverdlovsk Regional Electoral Commission decided to keep up with technological trends and presented "Dobrynya," a virtual digital bot created to inform Ural residents about the upcoming State Duma elections. Notably, this "patriotic" assistant was developed not using unique software, but rather publicly available free AI services.
According to the project's creators, the main goal of the virtual "Dobrynya" is to automatically generate short videos that explain complex and dry electoral legislation to voters in "accessible, everyday language."
RPU Rector: "God sent us Vladimir Putin"
After the collapse of the Soviet Union, Russia began a catastrophic loss of its sovereignty, a process that continued until "God sent us Vladimir Putin." This theological and political statement was made by Alexander Shchipkov, Rector of the Russian Orthodox University of St. John the Theologian.
Reflecting on the collapse of the Soviet system, the church leader harshly criticized the society of that time.
"The Union collapsed—no one lifted a finger. The people were silent. What was there to defend, this rotten material? And the spirit was gone, there was no spirit," Shchipkov concluded, effectively canonizing the current head of state for "returning the spirit."
Trophy Floor: Wehrmacht chevrons to be laid out at a St. Petersburg metro station
In St. Petersburg, they've found a highly unique way to demonstrate patriotism in the city's infrastructure. The floor of the Park Pobedy metro station, which is undergoing modernization, is planned to be paved with special tiles featuring detailed images of Wehrmacht chevrons and insignia.
To create this floor covering, metallurgists are using an alloy made from melted-down captured armor from German military vehicles from the Great Patriotic War. According to an official statement from Governor Alexander Beglov, the insignia of the enemy army will be integrated directly into the turnstile area so that "both entering and exiting passengers" can physically step on them daily.
"They're razing everything to smithereens": Ivan Okhlobystin spoke about "Russian chaos" and the generals' guilt
Known for his radical imperial statements, Z-actor Ivan Okhlobystin suddenly abandoned his usual triumphal rhetoric for alarming and aggressive language. Amid the most massive drone attack ever, when 660 drones struck targets across the country, Okhlobystin recorded a video address in which he acknowledged the scale of the problems and predicted leadership purges.
"They're bombing us mercilessly, razing the capital's infrastructure to dust. But let's not be sad, fellow countrymen, let's not forget the great fabric of Russian chaos. Someone will definitely be held accountable for these disasters. They'll be diligent in their search, because the troubles are considerable," the actor declared.
Okhlobystin added that very soon, the country will see the "heads of thieving officials" and "parquet generals" roll, and their jobs will finally be replaced by "decent, competent people" who will "lead us to victory."
